i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
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