ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
What changed your mind?
Being sober
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
