do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Randomize
