You work out of a Hotel?
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
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