At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
tell me about the fingering
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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