I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Randomize
