whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
Kareoke will never be a sober sport
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Randomize