But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize
