Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Randomize