They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
