I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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