ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
