what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
