last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Never joke about your clitoris.
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
