This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
