just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Randomize
