I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
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