she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Randomize
