tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
i just made my gag reflex go away.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
I'm going to write a horror movie. It's going to be called "Fat People on a Squeaky Bed" and it's going to feature me laying in bed last night listening to my overweight roommate and her fat boyfriend tossing and turning all night
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
