i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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