i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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