laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
