Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
