white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
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