Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
