Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Randomize
