He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
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