I hate all girls vehemently.
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
