No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
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