another moral hangover. fuck.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
Randomize
