hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Randomize
