Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
Of course I have a pirate flag
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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