I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
Randomize
