oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
