Me. At least after what I've been through.
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
Randomize
