No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
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