I just ate a cockroach and I want to be a fire truck.
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Randomize
