Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
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