white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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