Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Randomize
