If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
i believe in u and ur pee
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
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