We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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