glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
