I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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