ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
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