Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Randomize
