It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
My ass is underappreciated
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
