also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Randomize
