It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
Randomize
