I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
Who did Billy Mays play for?
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Randomize
